I wrote this for the vicar who did the service at Del's funeral. We are NOT a religious family and she didn't know him...
"Although Del had never excelled himself academically, he was considered by a number of people to be ‘the font of all knowledge’.
When we were at youth club, back in our teenage years, he was even given the nickname of “wise old freak”.
He could chat about anything, with knowledge, from politics, history, geography to sixties rock music. But saying that, he wasn’t a loud talkative person, quite the opposite. He would always prefer to hide in the background, lacking confidence and just quietly get to the forefront.
His humour was the only thing he was ever quick with. He could hit back with a pun or a quick quip, and make anyone smile. He also had an amazing memory for jokes, which most people forget. But maybe this also shows his rather eccentric mind that could retain all those ‘useless’ and often ‘useful’ facts.
Del’s punctuality was an art form, he was often late. No!.. he was always late… He would keep friends and family waiting hours. I can remember frequent frustrating times when Del always seemed unmoved and totally calm while everyone was panicking around him. You could say that his funeral is possibly the first time he has actually been early for an event.
Recently he has used another nickname for himself “The Mediæval Hippy” which did sum him up well, and shows his considerable power with words.
Del liked word games, puzzles, he could even finish the Guardian cryptic crossword. And he liked doing Sudoku too.
He liked to feed the birds and any wildlife. He was a member of the RSPB and had a variety of feeders and containers to feed the birds outside. He would not kill another living thing, which I often think included the weeds in his garden, as well as, rats and houseflies.
His hobby with the CB radio had led to a lot of friends in Enfield where he had lived until 1999 when he moved with Mum and Dad to Anglesey. He used to rush out at any time of day or night to help and assist other CB users. Del was a very kind person.
After his move to Wales, his use of the CB had diminished but he still kept in touch with a lot of the same people with his computer.
He used to watch volcanoes and took a great interest in earthquakes, some of this from live web cams. The computer was a source of more knowledge and a way to communicate for him.
He had taken on the job of looking after both parents, without really being aware of it, until it became too much. He had never learnt to cook more than a few things in the microwave. But he had even started to take on all the responsibilities of running a household, although we do seem to be a family that abhors paperwork.
The Pub-Quiz nights, at The George & Dragon, Beaumaris had been a time for him to shine with his knowledge and gift for useless facts. He had managed to get a carer to take care of mum to enable him to have 2 nights a week off, this meant he had a much needed break. Here he was starting to meet new friends and gaining respect.
Del has always been a very private person and also stuck in routines and was reluctant to face changes. I can only imagine how he had taken to his move from Enfield to Wales. In the past, he had often taken Mum and Dad on holiday, as he liked to drive and they wanted a chauffeur. They had explored a lot of corners of the UK, but never gone abroad. I think he came to Wales thinking it would be like a long holiday.
Del had grown his hair long, while he was at school, and had stuck with it to the end. His treatment was almost certainly going to make him lose his hair and I am glad he never had to face that. He was known by his long hair, I have found I only have to describe him and he is remembered… He had taken all sorts of teases and taunts about his hair, but he took a pride in it, it was always clean and combed meticulously.
Every person that I have told about his death has commented about his humour and quick wittedness. Even at the care home – Bryn Ceirios – the patients and staff have got to know the witty side of Del. Del seems to have had a talent to make people smile.
Del lacked any form of ambition and accepted life and everything it brought to him. Having no ambition also made the chance of failure unlikely and therefore, he was happy, while all around loved him, but also screamed at him to do ‘something’."
Now I have to continue life without him...
A friend gave me a box of chocolates yesterday... now I will have to find someone else to give the Turkish Delight ones too... Del always had those...
Thank you everyone for your comments, both in private and in here.
xx
